Here’s a real consumer tip: Avoid costly bargains on the web.
While reading the article about the judge rejecting a trial for global warming, I noticed ads for tooth whitening. Curious, I clicked. This lead me to “Don’t Break the Bank: A Mom’s Trick to Whiter Teeth” published at a consumer tips site. (Cough!).
The article explained how an ordinary woman who once gave birth had found an inexpensive way to whiten her teeth. All she had to do was sign up for two nearly free samples of tooth whitening toothpaste, use one, then the other, and voila! White teeth! (The products are Premium White and South Beach Brite. Using the web sites discount code, you can get each for $1.95.)
Now, I drink loads of coffee and red wine. My teeth could use some whitening. But… but… something about this doesn’t sound quite right.
In fact, it’s not quote right. If you don’t read the agreement describing what you are buying, this is what you will think you are getting when you spend $1.95 for Premium White:
Premium White (the following was taken directly from their website) Upon registering, providing the requisite Registration Data and ordering the Premium Whiteâ„¢ Products, the credit or debit card that you provided during registration or updated at a later date (“Active Credit Cardâ€) will be charged a non-refundable shipping and handling fee of Two Dollars and Ninety-Five Cents ($2.95) (“Shipping and Handling Feeâ€) for
your initial fourteen (14) day trial membership (“Trial Membershipâ€), you will receivea one (1) month supply of Premium Whiteâ„¢ Productsand you will be automatically enrolled in our Member program.
Not a bad price for a tube of toothpaste that may or may not whiten your teeth. Using the coupon code to knock the price down to $1.95 seems like an even better bargain.
But notice the words I struck out? You aren’t signing up to buy a tube of toothpaste, you are signing up for a trial membership. This word should send shudders up your spine. Reading the agreement, you will notice this:
If you do not cancel your Trial Membership during the applicable fourteen (14) day period as set forth in Section 7 hereinbelow, your Active Credit Card will be charged the monthly Membership fee of Eighty-Seven Dollars and Sixty-Two Cents ($87.62) (“Monthly Feeâ€). Your next (1) month supply of Premium Whiteâ„¢ Products will be shipped thirty (30) days from the date that your initial one (1) month supply was shipped in connection with your Trial Membership. Thereafter, for as long as your Membership remains active, your Active Credit Card will be charged the Monthly Fee on a monthly basis, for your ongoing Membership.
So, in fourteen days you will be charged $87.52. Meanwhile the next tube of toothpaste will be shipped 16 days after you are charged. So, you probably won’t notice the $87.52 charge until you see your credit card bill. If that comes every 30 days, there is a pretty strong possibility you won’t notice the charge in time to cancel before the next months membership fee is charged. That would be nearly $180 for toothpaste!
But it gets worse because you are being advised to use two products. Your $1.95 trial membership for South Beach Brite enroles you in a membership program with a monthly fee of “$79.95 (25% discount off retail price) for the full 30-day supply of South Beach Brite received by you with your risk free trial.”
Ouch! That hurts!
Advice: Trial memberships can be fine. Membership programs can be fine if you actually want to enroll. But you should read all fine print before authorizing any online vendor charge $1.95 to your credit card. If, after reading, you still want the toothpaste, but don’t want to enroll in an expensive monthly membership program, remember to cancel the membership before you trigger additional charges. (As for me: I’m just buying this toothpaste. )
Bicarbonate of soda is effective, and also helps sort out any indigestion you might have from the wine and the coffee. The Romans used urine, but I’m not recommending it. Don’t drink so much that you pass out before brushing your teeth – that’s my main tip!
You get what you pay for. Which in this case may well be the most expensive toothpaste ever sold.
Bicarbonate of soda is also much less than $150 a month for a generous supply.
What a scam. Of course, they have a disclosure statement at the bottom of the page, but how often do people read the small print.
How disappointing – the offer is not available in my area.
Now all the tooth whitening ads are on this page of course.
So can we take revenge and benefit Lucia by clicking on them?
I just clicked on a few of them.
How much do you get when someone clicks?!
PaulM–
I bet your consumer protection laws are stronger. This scam won’t work if a jurisdiction won’t enforce these automatic enrollments in membership programs.
On the other issue: How much I get when people click depends on how much the advertiser paid for the keywords. Advertisers bid on different key words. So, it will all depend on how much words like “tooth whitening” were bid up on the ‘net. Thinks like “knitting yarn” tend to be 0.10 most of the year, but rates rise during knitting season. (That is: winter.)
But also, I’m not supposed to encourage people to click. Google also does other things to figure out if clicks convert. If everyone just goes on a click rampage for things that don’t interesting them, I think I can end up being paid less. (I don’t buy ads from Google, so I don’t know precisely what they do.) So… click if you are interested or curious. (Anyway, it’s possible the ads appearing here aren’t the spammy deceptive ones. LOTS of people sell different toothwhitening product. They aren’t all scammers!).
Tooth paste and tooth whiteners must have been invented in Arkansas. Otherwise, they would have called them teeth paste and teeth whiteners. 🙂
It’s disappointing that these ads are not only allowed but seem to be flourishing and even major sites such as msnbc.com feature them. They are scams, pure and simple. Common ads convert your IP address to location so you’ll see something like “(your town) Mom makes $75/hr and you can too!”. By making it appear to be a local person you are less likely to suspect a scam. They also show links to “news” sources such as New13.tv and the site looks like a local TV station site, again trying to build credibility so they can rip you off.
It’s a shame nothing is done to stop this type of deceptive advertising.
A much smaller scam, but about as cheeky as you can get:
A few years back when the state quarters were first coming out, parents of young children (waives hand) were suckered into buying those coin holders to hold all the state coins. You know, big fold out thing with a map of the US and a place for each state coin in its place. Well, Mr. Cheapskate thought he’d got a great deal, $2.99, plus “four quarters to get you started, FREE!”
Of course, “see details inside”.
Well, for a mere $4.99 shipping and handling, they would generously send those “FREE!” quarters.
I think my wife was willing to send them 20 bucks, just for the fun she got out of that one.
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Duane Johnson (Comment#23671)
November 18th, 2009 at 12:06 pm
Around here, there’s a standard joke about the surrounding hinterlands.
Question: “What’s 30 feet long, weighs four and half tons, and has twelve teeth?”
Answer: “The funnel-cake line at the xxxxx fair.”
A good friend of mine in Edmonton recently fell prey to just such a scam for an acai berry product shipped from England. For a mere $2 she supposedly would get a sample, but instead she received four months worth at a charge of $130 each. She has disputed the credit card charges, cancelled her card, and is shipping the crap back. Nothing is yet resolved.
The moral she learned, much to her chagrin: never order anything online at 1am.
Bill: “It’s a shame nothing is done to stop this type of deceptive advertising.”
Lucia just did something, by writing about it. Those who care have to try. The nanny state has freed us from runs on banks and shady securities scams, but taking over money, insuring banks and regukating public companies, right?